Diary of a Pregnant Virgin #3

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Dear Diary,

Needless to say, I’m thrilled and honored that God chose me for this, but there are two things that are worrying me. One is… I’m fourteen. I’m pregnant. And I only just got engaged.

Anna down the street got pregnant last year. She was hardly older than me, and definitely not married. Everyone whispered for days, and then… she disappeared. I haven’t seen her since. Some people say they stoned her to death.

I can kind of understand that, actually. It is in God’s law. God told Moses that if an engaged woman is caught having sex outside of marriage, “Take them both to the town gate and stone them to death. You must get rid of the evil they brought into your community.”

That isn’t exactly what happened to me, of course, but when my belly starts showing, what are they supposed to think? I notice that nowhere does it say, “unless the woman got pregnant without having sex.” Yeah, that would have been helpful.

Listen to me. My life is hanging in the balance—not to mention the whole future of the world—and here I am making jokes. It’s a miracle I’m still holding it together at all.

Then there’s the other thing. I’m engaged to a wonderful man who loves me like I’ve always wanted to be loved. I love him too, with all my heart and soul. If I tell him about this, it will break his heart. When I accepted that ring, it was as if I was marrying him already. I made a promise. I said that I would be only his till death do us part. He believed me. What will he think when he finds out? He’ll think I lied, that I was just playing with his feelings. He’ll think I never loved him as much as he loves me. He’ll think the whole time we’ve been together was just a big lie.

It will crush him.

People have killed themselves over less.

But it’s not like that. I do love him. I meant all the things I said. I have never lied to him once, not once. He gave me his heart, and now I’m about to break it. But what else can I do?

God, I hope it’s not selfish for me to pray for myself when you’re busy arranging the salvation of Israel here. But please, let Joseph understand. Let him still love me. And please, don’t let my parents stone me to death. Remember your promises to Israel. Help me to stay faithful to you no matter what happens. Amen.



Deuteronomy 22:23-24

1 comments:

Rachel Hicks said...

wow!!!! My favorite so far!!!!!! thanks for keeping up and getting them out so fast!!!! I love them!!!